Comments on: Dealing with generosity

By: Lend Stop - I Want A Kid

Lend Stop - I Want A Kid — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 21:57:06 +0000

[...] in the day, and by that I mean last year, I had a number of readers want to donate to help me buy a fridge or a mattress. While I truly appreciate the gesture, there are so many children who are in much worse situations [...]

By: I Want A Kid

I Want A Kid — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 19:46:11 +0000

By: allthingznew

allthingznew — Tue, 17 Jul 2007 01:51:28 +0000

I understand how you feel. But what blessing are you denying the person who wants to give you the fridge? What I mean is, if you have to sow to reap, look at it as allowing this person to sow into your life, so they can reap themselves. Look at it from their standpoint. It’s better to give, yes let them give and you then in turn can give somewhere else. Believe it or not there are people worse off than you.

Be grateful and allow this person the opportunity to be a blessing, you’re not asking for hand outs. Wouldn’t you want the same opportunity to help someone else?

Just my 2

By: Pups 1

Pups 1 — Mon, 16 Jul 2007 17:55:50 +0000

I certainly hope that what you mean to say in #20 is that your bookkeeper is allowing you to stretch out your payments to him/her, not that you are stretching out your billing. I don’t think your cashflow could take any invoicing delays. You are in a precarious situation, with you essentially being the company. Prepare for an eventual Ch.11 filing also, in case you qualify. Take your current business records and 1120s (or whatever# your tax report) with you when you see the attorney. Overprepare but be 100% truthful–it will all come out anyway.

By: debt kid

debt kid — Mon, 16 Jul 2007 15:56:48 +0000

Pups 1,

You are right about my business operations. Since the start of Q3 I am no longer mixing bus/personal funds. I also have a bookkeeper (who is stretching out billing for me) now. I’m still sorting things out, but by next month I should have very clear financial statements and no worries about mixing business and personal accounts again.

As for Chapter 7 vs. Chapter 13? Looking at my last 7 months of personal income, I’ve not been paying myself much at all and so its possible I can file Chapter 7. I’ve almost completely all the paperwork my lawyer has requested. I should have all of the required paperwork in my lawyer by the end of the week. The goal is to file by the end of the month.

By: Pups 1

Pups 1 — Mon, 16 Jul 2007 15:48:24 +0000

I tend to disagree with your comment that you have a (somewhat) successful business. You mention positive cashflow from business operations several times in past stories, with the idea of increasing this number. However, it seems that you are still co-mingling funds, a big no-no. In my opinion, your business is not successful until the employees are paid, accounts collected, bills paid, paperwork completed, and taxes filed and paid. These are basic tenets and I have seen many companies undone by not completing one or more of these tasks.Only mentioned as background, I am a former factory owner (sold in 2002)and still own a profitable corporation, so I have some experience and perspective.
I also notice that you have changed your mind about filing Ch. 13; now I see you are proceeding to a Ch. 7. What happened? There is so much info you attorney will have to provide, the sooner the better. Having this loosely financially-controlled business is going to be your undoing, I am afraid. Do whatever it takes to get legal advice STAT.

By: Lost Cause

Lost Cause — Sun, 15 Jul 2007 21:15:08 +0000

I would swallow my pride — which is what we are talking about here — and take whatever. It is nice to distinguish between sources of money, but that kind of choice vanished with the trading fiasco. Sorry to be a contraian on this point. You have an obligation to your creditors.

By: B

Sat, 14 Jul 2007 01:59:11 +0000

No… I’m not going for the ‘cold, heartless’ stereotype. I’m talking about breaking down even situations that may have emotional significance for you into cost-benefit-opportunity. I suppose gearing everything you do in that way…

Hard to explain.

Possibly it’s just human nature, especially after having a hard time with money, to constantly watch out for ways to keep getting better at making it.

But you’re a lovely, lovely man. And hugs are free. *virtual hugs*

Stay human!

By: Alexis

Alexis — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 13:17:14 +0000

I’d like to give you a hug.

By: nika

nika — Fri, 13 Jul 2007 02:31:48 +0000

As far as accepting the mini fridge-

Since I’m not quite sure what your business actually is let’s say it is selling servers. If on of your loyal, trustworthy clients came to you and said they needed a server, but they couldn’t afford to pay you for it today-would you give them the server? I think you probably would in the hopes your good will would be rewarded generously down the line.

Now let’s say that the client can’t pay you for the server after a while but he generates enough quality business your way that you make in profit what he would have owed you? Do you still demand the money? From the good nature you have shown in your posts, I think you would not, or at least maybe accept a partial payment.

That’s what the mini fridge is-someone’s attempt to reward your good behavior so that in the future you may help another.

Today, I bought some doughnuts for my co-workers. Outside the shop there was a homeless man with a sign asking for help. I didn’t want to give him money, so I bought him 2 blueberry muffins and coffee-which cost an additional $3.

I don’t know if he ate them, or tossed them or thought “why didn’t she give me some money instead?” It doesn’t matter. The good deed was done. Hopefully, he will help someone else in their time of need.

Should you accept the fridge? Only if you would do the same for someone in their time of need. From the tone and tenor of your posts, I think you would.